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FallingI cant believe this has happened. I cannot believe what terrible pain I put myself through. And for what? Wasted time, and broken dreams. Shattered and hopeless dreams. And it was all a lie. Every last word that was said to me. The story changed everyday, for almost two years. I don't know what I did to deserve what I was put through. I believe in karma, so maybe it was payback. Was it really worth dying over? To die because I couldn't live with the thought of not having such a wonderful person in my life? But it wasn't wonderful. It was beyond terrible. It has scarred me in every way possible. Im afraid to start over and let my walls down, yet I know its something that is unavoidable. Its going to happen no matter what. Im just scared. I don't want to give in, just to be hurt again. I really could not live with myself if I am put through that pain again. It kills me to sit here and think about it all, after having done such a good job of keeping it off of my mind. Ive been
Its overMy world is slowly crumbling down. All the feelings i once had are all gone. Everything i felt that kept me alive, its gone, because you're gone. I know its all going to get worse from here, so lets hope i make it out... I don't see a light at the end of the tunnel anymore.
You...Did I really mean nothing to you? Everything you said, everything you did, was it all for nothing? Every time we kissed, every time I made you smile and cry, every hug, every time we made love, everything? All the memories, two whole years. Every tear, every laugh, every time you got butterflies in your stomach, every time our hands were intertwined, every time you promised you'd never let me go I am this close to finally letting go of you. Letting go of every single day we spent together . How on earth can you do it so easily? I wish I was like you.. Strong. But me? Im weak.
I took down all your memories and boxed up all your gifts, they are now safe away from my view. To see them will bring you back. As of now im trying to erase it all. Everything I don't want to, but I have to. Nothing lasts forever. Im doing it for you, for me, for my family, and most importantly her.
Ive said goodbye a few times now, but I wouldn't be writing this is I didn't
The last timeOne last look at all the pictures A few more tears.. One last glance at what we could have had. Was it all a waste? No, im told. I learned and experienced some of the greatest things in my life. How many times can you try before it isn't good enough anymore? Its not gona be easy, but I think I can do it. Let go, live life. That's all I can do, is just live. What happens, happens, and we have no control. "Live, Laugh, Love" That's what you told me, and its what I shall live by. It was for the best, because it was bound to happen eventually. If we meet in the future, who knows what will happen. But like I said, what happens, happens. So I have one last thing to say to you. Don't take it the wrong way, just remember that everything that we had, said and did was all real. So here it goes Goodbye.
Cant handle itDo you know how hard it was to say goodbye? How hard it was not to cry that you arent mine anymore? To see you scorn me, and wish horrible things upon me. To make me suffer. To push me past the point of destruction.
All ive ever wanted was to see you happy. But now that i see it, ive come to the realization that i cant handle it.
But with her, i feel alive again. My body tingles and tells me to follow my heart. But my brain is telling me to stop and think about what im doing. The feeling of lust and passion fills my being, but shortly after i feel the agony grow stronger.
I don't want her to stop, i want to go all the way. I don't want you to leave, i want you to stay.
Am i moving on? Or is what im doing wrong. I don't know what to do, i don't know what to say. I cant let go. I cant just pretend that all those memories mean nothing. It meant the world. It was everything i ever needed.
I don't want you to leave, but i suffer because of it. I cant delete you from my life. And
FarwellI miss the days you held me and the days I hear your voice. I miss the days you were there. Us falling apart wasnt my choice. I miss the days you kissed me and the feelings we used to show. But most of all I miss the girl that I thought I used to know.
Im tired of feeling this way. I know it would be right for me to let go but no matter how much I tell myself to do it, I cant. I tell myself that its better to never see you again, but no matter how much I try to forget, it always makes me remember all the good times we had, and even the bad, and how much I regret the things Ive done, all the things Ive said.
I miss you all the time but I miss you the most when I lie awake at night and think of all the wonderful times we spent with each other, for those were some of the best and memorable times of my life.
A lot of people walk in and out of my life, but... you're one of the only ones I ever really wanted to stick around.
You never know what you have until you lose it, and once you lose i
The EndGoodbye to you, goodbye to us. You will never be forgotten,or replaced. No one can take your place. I never said i wouldnt be happy with someone else, they just wont be what you were. My first everything Ill sit back and look at this one day and remember one simple thing That i loved you.
Not aloneUnder the stars, we run in the wind. Taking every single moment that we can.
Look into your eyes, we run from the lights.Believe it but you can't know how I feel.
I can't believe that you still think we're friends. Like someone I just met, you can't pretend. That you don't feel the magic, tell your mind. And I am on a mission to show you how.
These are moments you can't live without, knowing that you can't ever say goodbye.
And you feel like you're all alone. Can't you recover your heart and let it go?
And you see just how good we'd be. Just close your eyes now and let your body feel.
And now you feel like you're all alone.
My love will surround you, in ways that you don't know.
And now you feel like it could be real.
My love will surround you, close your eyes and see.
And out of this daze, where memories were made. And tell you how the life you want to leave.
Lightning will strike in a way that you like. And fate will take its hand just come to me.
I can't believe you're coming back a
Winter dreamMy eyes shoot open and I sit up quickly in bed. I look over at the alarm clock "3:30" a.m. It reads. I turn to look over at you, but you aren't there. I call out your name as I look around the moon lit room and touch your place in the bed. I take off the covers and get up to find you. I peer out the sliding glass doors of our room, it's snowing again. So I put on my cheetah print slippers, grab a jacket and walk to the back door. I look out again and touch the frozen glass. My warm breath leaves condensation; I run my fingers across it. I notice footsteps in the snow, so I open the back door and step out on the porch. I call your name again and still no answer. The footsteps seem to lead off into the woods, I follow them. I shiver a little as I pass the gate and get farther away from the house. Looking around the snow fallen woods I gaze up at the stars. They twinkle. Coming back down to earth, I see you standing about twenty feet away from me. You are still in your pajamas. "There you
Darling, Don't You DareTo the girl who skips dinner,
Because her reflection hurts more than
To the boy who wears sweatshirts
On hot summer days,
Because he doesn’t want his mother to cry over his
To the boy who weeps uncontrollably
Until he falls asleep,
Because it’s the only way to escape into his
To the girl who spends her days in her bedroom,
Because the dark is more peaceful than her
To the child who gets angry,
Because no one understands.
To the teens who self-harm,
To the ones in recovery,
To the ones that just can’t do it anymore…
For the girl who skips meals
And the boy who wears sweatshirts,
For the boy who cries,
The girl who hides,
And the ones who just can’t do it anymore.
You’ve come this far.
Don’t you dare give up on it, now.
I am the daughter of a sailor.There is pure sea water
rushing through my veins
& my vocabulary can be
just as colorful.
how do I begin to tell you
we all have jungles growing
in our chests?-
by human hands?
I like to pretend
it’s Draco residing
in this chest of mine-
clogging my lungs,
I have forgotten
how to write
or anything with a shred
I have no space left within myself
for celestial, fire breathing dragons-
because I realize now
when I look in the mirror,
I do not see my father.
I screamMy scream is loud.
My scream is honest.
My scream is desperate.
My scream is filled with truth.
Why would nobody hear me?
You're Not DepressedDepression isn’t what you think it is.
You’re just sad.
If you and your boyfriend or girlfriend just broke up, you’re not depressed.
If you are longing to be with that one girl or boy, you’re not depressed.
If you really want to meet that one celebrity, you’re not depressed.
If you haven’t gotten a text from any of your friends all day and want to talk to someone, you’re not depressed.
If you cried in the shower last night because you want that guy to be your boyfriend,
Or sat on your bed last night with your face in your hands wanting to be with that one girl,
You’re not depressed.
Until you have hated yourself,
Felt no self-worth,
Felt like you’d never amount to anything
And are useless,
You want to lie in bed all day and do nothing but think,
Think you are never good enough for anyone,
Don’t deserve anyone,
Lost any interest in drawing, writing, reading, singing, etc…
You don’t want to be around anyone, just by
dearly belovedthese days
your name has been slipping
in and out of my rib cage
my heart forgets to beat.
how even after all these months i still
don't want to believe that
you're dead. how during the
first couple of weeks i prayed
to a god i didn't believe in and begged to know
if death tasted sweet to you. how once,
when the monsters in my head
didn't let me sleep, i
wrote you three poems and then
you were a supernova that
lit up my life for
a few radiant moments before,
like all good things in this
you came to an end.
the sinner in me hopes that you have wings now.
but i think that,
most of all,
i hope you no longer
remember what pain
Let me dieGo away
Leave me alone
And let me die
Of this world
I don't want to live
Because there's no light
At the end of this tunnel
So I'll just end my life
Don't try to stop me
And we'll meet again
On the other side
Outside this dark tunnel
I am afraid of monsters like you.Bones and sinew cling
to the part of me
that is not human,
the part of me that
Your lips are ready
to pounce mine when
you lace my neck with
the collar of hope.
It hangs too tightly.
Only GirlsOnly Girls can suffer from weight loss,
can cut and cut until their blood is all gone.
Only girls can cry out their angry emotions,
and watch them pool from their eyes like the raging oceans.
Emotions are qualities reserved for women women only,
without them, what men would bask in their glory.
Only women can abort an unwanted fetus,
when a man mourns his lost child, he's nothing but a bigoted sexist.
Only girls can wear their hair long,
put on cake loads of make up, and twirl their hips to a song.
Strip down in public to your bra and underwear,
only girls will get angry when their objectified by eyes everywhere.
Only girls can swallow the pills,
because boys are never depressed, they only grow ill.
Only a woman can claw at her defenseless husband,
and when he tries to defend himself, he's considered little to nothing.
Cry 'sexual-harassment' in the midst of your workplace,
only girls can get away with this, when nothing was done to them in the first place.
Abuse is impossible if it ha
words, wonderlight has faded and words are heavy,
but there is a delicate magic
twisting between your fingers.
it is all a-scribble
melisma without music;
syllables stitching terra firma
to firmament in intricate
stanzas that require
neither breath nor sound
to echo, infinite,
within the depths
of susurrous souls.
it is cold and it is dark,
but there is a fire in you
and you use it with a fierce grace
that illuminates the shadows,
and ignites the demons
until not even the grey spaces
that haunt and harry
can hold dominion.
they are exposed
they are broken
into shards of sunrise
and rays of a quiet
you scare away the night
with exhalations that blow
away the fogged emptiness
inside, over and over,
sparking fireworks from
what was thought
to be ash.
Take my lifeThis is what i get. You got your wish, my world is crashing down around me. I should have never let you go. I was wrong. I was more than wrong. Im trying so hard not to do anything stupid. We all have something worth living for, but im tired of waiting for it. You will never see this, you will never care, and you will never love me. Im sorry, for everything.
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scheinbar is a much-loved and well-known deviant. Just one look at her gallery, filled with enchanting photography, will have you mesmerized. A deviant for over 7 years, Christiane can always be found posting inspirational features as well as regularly commenting on other deviations and encouraging and empowering her fellow deviants. We are inspired and insist that you too stop by and congratulate ... Read More